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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Ps 69:2 Klimpstu į dumbliną gelmę, nėra kur koja pasiremti. Patekau į gilius vandenis, ir bangos mane skandina.
Ps 69:2 I sink in deep mire, where there is no standing: I am come into deep waters, where the floods overflow me.
Pr 31:45 Tuomet Jokūbas paėmė akmenį ir pastatė jį kaip paminklą.
Ge 31:45 And Jacob took a stone, and set it up for a pillar.
Rut 4:21 Salmai ­ Boazas, Boazui ­ Jobedas,
Ru 4:21 And Salmon begat Boaz, and Boaz begat Obed,
Pat 8:32 Tad dabar, mano vaikai, paklausykite manęs. Laimingi, kurie laikosi mano kelių!
Pr 8:32 Now therefore hearken unto me, O ye children: for blessed are they that keep my ways.
Pr 24:32 Vyras užėjo į namus, ir nuo kupranugarių buvo nuimtos naštos. Kupranugariai buvo pašerti šiaudais ir pašaru, o jam ir vyrams, buvusiems su juo, atnešta vandens kojoms nusiplauti.
Ge 24:32 And the man came into the house: and he ungirded his camels, and gave straw and provender for the camels, and water to wash his feet, and the men's feet that were with him.
Rom 8:23 Ir ne tik ji, bet ir mes patys, kurie turime Dvasios pirmuosius vaisius, ir mes dejuojame, laukdami įsūnijimo ir mūsų kūno atpirkimo.
Ro 8:23 And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.
Iš 23:30 Pamažu juos varysiu tau iš akių, kolei tu pagausėsi ir paveldėsi kraštą.
Ex 23:30 By little and little I will drive them out from before thee, until thou be increased, and inherit the land.
Ps 119:105 נ Tavo žodis ­ žibintas mano žingsniamsir šviesa mano takui.
Ps 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.
1Kor 5:7 Išmeskite senąjį raugą, kad taptumėte nauju maišymu. Jūs juk esate nerauginti, nes jau paaukotas mūsų velykinis Avinėlis, Kristus.
1C 5:7 Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened. For even Christ our passover is sacrificed for us:
Sk 9:4 Tad Mozė paliepė izraelitams atnašauti Paschą,
Nu 9:4 And Moses spake unto the children of Israel, that they should keep the passover.
Iz 23:11 Viešpats ištiesė savo ranką virš marių, išgąsdino karalystes ir paliepė, kad būtų sugriautos Kanaano tvirtovės.
Isa 23:11 He stretched out his hand over the sea, he shook the kingdoms: the LORD hath given a commandment against the merchant city, to destroy the strong holds thereof.
Žyd 12:9 Jau mūsų kūno tėvai mus pabausdavo, ir mes juos gerbėme. Tad argi nebūsime dar klusnesni dvasių Tėvui, kad gyventume? !
He 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
Iš 23:11 bet septintais metais leisi jai pailsėti ir dirvonuoti. Tesimaitina iš jos jūsų beturčiai ir teėda laukiniai gyvuliai, kas nuo beturčių atliks. Taip pasielgsite ir su vynuogynais, ir su alyvmedžių sodais.
Ex 23:11 But the seventh year thou shalt let it rest and lie still; that the poor of thy people may eat: and what they leave the beasts of the field shall eat. In like manner thou shalt deal with thy vineyard, and with thy oliveyard.
Job 31:37 dėl visų savo žingsnių duočiau jam apyskaitą, prisiartinčiau prie jo pakelta galva.
Job 31:37 I would declare unto him the number of my steps; as a prince would I go near unto him.
Sk 13:20 Ar žemė derlinga, ar skurdi, ar yra joje medžių, ar ne? Būkite drąsūs ir parneškite šį tą iš krašto vaisių. " Tuomet buvo ankstyvųjų vynuogių metas.
Nu 13:20 And what the land is, whether it be fat or lean, whether there be wood therein, or not. And be ye of good courage, and bring of the fruit of the land. Now the time was the time of the firstripe grapes.
1Kor 8:8 Maistas negali mūsų priartinti prie Dievo. Kai nevalgome, nieko neprarandame, ir kai valgome, nieko nelaimime.
1C 8:8 But meat commendeth us not to God: for neither, if we eat, are we the better; neither, if we eat not, are we the worse.
Lk 1:6 Abu jie buvo teisūs Dievo akyse ir nepriekaištingai vykdė visus Viešpaties įsakymus bei nuostatus.
Lu 1:6 And they were both righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
Dan 4:27 Todėl, o karaliau, tebūna tau priimtinas mano patarimas: išpirk savo nuodėmes teisumo darbais, o savo nusikaltimus ­ gailestingumu vargšams. Tuomet tavo gerovė bus patvari. "
Da 4:27 Wherefore, O king, let my counsel be acceptable unto thee, and break off thy sins by righteousness, and thine iniquities by shewing mercy to the poor; if it may be a lengthening of thy tranquillity.
Pr 49:6 Tenedalyvauja mano siela jų taryboje, tenebūna įtraukta mano garbė į jų bendrystę, nes kai jie įniršta, žudo vyrus, ir kai jiems malonu, luošina jaučius.
Ge 49:6 O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their selfwill they digged down a wall.
Jn 18:11 Bet Jėzus sudraudė Petrą: "Kišk savo kalaviją į makštį! Nejaugi aš negersiu tos taurės, kurią Tėvas man yra davęs? ! "
Jo 18:11 Then said Jesus unto Peter, Put up thy sword into the sheath: the cup which my Father hath given me, shall I not drink it?

Sanctus Corpus Deus