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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Kar 10:35 Taigi Jehuvas užmigo su savo protėviais ir buvo palaidotas Samarijoje. Vietoj jo karaliumi tapo jo sūnus Jehoahazas.
2Ki 10:35 And Jehu slept with his fathers: and they buried him in Samaria. And Jehoahaz his son reigned in his stead.
Mk 9:20 Jie atvedė. Vos pamačiusi Jėzų, dvasia ėmė tąsyti berniuką, šis parpuolė ant žemės ir apsiputojęs pradėjo blaškytis.
Mar 9:20 And they brought him unto him: and when he saw him, straightway the spirit tare him; and he fell on the ground, and wallowed foaming.
Pat 26:20 Nepridedant malkų, užgęsta ugnis, o nesant liežuvautojo, nutyla ginčas.
Pr 26:20 Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out: so where there is no talebearer, the strife ceaseth.
Kun 18:6 Nė vienas jūsų nesueis su artima giminaite atidengti nuogumo; aš esu Viešpats.
Le 18:6 None of you shall approach to any that is near of kin to him, to uncover their nakedness: I am the LORD.
2Kar 3:25 ir sunaikino miestus. Kiekvienas vyras metė po akmenį į kiekvieną derlingą lauką, kol jis pasidarė nusėtas akmenimis. Jie užvertė kiekvieną vandens šaltinį ir nukirto visus vaismedžius. Kir Hareseto akmeninės sienos tik tol laikėsi, kol svaidytojai jo neapgulė ir nepuolė.
2Ki 3:25 And they beat down the cities, and on every good piece of land cast every man his stone, and filled it; and they stopped all the wells of water, and felled all the good trees: only in Kirharaseth left they the stones thereof; howbeit the slingers went about it, and smote it.
2Krn 18:7 Izraelio karalius atsakė Juozapatui: "Dar yra vienas vyras, per kurį galėtume Viešpaties pasiteirauti, Imlos sūnus Michėjas, bet aš jo nekenčiu, nes jis niekada nepranašauja apie mane gera, bet visuomet nelaimę. " ­ "Tenekalba taip karalius", ­ atsakė Juozapatas.
2Ch 18:7 And the king of Israel said unto Jehoshaphat, There is yet one man, by whom we may enquire of the LORD: but I hate him; for he never prophesied good unto me, but always evil: the same is Micaiah the son of Imla. And Jehoshaphat said, Let not the king say so.
Ez 28:20 Mane pasiekė Viešpaties žodis:
Eze 28:20 Again the word of the LORD came unto me, saying,
Iz 17:5 Tarsi glėbys šiaudų pjovėjui, kai pjūties metu jis nuima dirvos derlių, arba kai renkamos varpos Refajų slėnyje,
Isa 17:5 And it shall be as when the harvestman gathereth the corn, and reapeth the ears with his arm; and it shall be as he that gathereth ears in the valley of Rephaim.
Ez 12:12 O vadas, kuris yra tarp jų, sutemus užsikels savo ryšulį ant peties ir išeis. Jie pralauš sienoje skylę jam išvesti; jis užsidengs veidą taip, kad krašto nematytų savo akimis.
Eze 12:12 And the prince that is among them shall bear upon his shoulder in the twilight, and shall go forth: they shall dig through the wall to carry out thereby: he shall cover his face, that he see not the ground with his eyes.
1Sam 2:13 nei kunigų pareigų žmonėms. Kam nors atnašaujant auką, mėsai dar tebeverdant, ateidavo kunigo tarnas su trišake rankoje
1Sa 2:13 And the priest's custom with the people was, that, when any man offered sacrifice, the priest's servant came, while the flesh was in seething, with a fleshhook of three teeth in his hand;
1Sam 11:12 Žmonės kalbėjo Samueliui: "Kas drįso sakyti: ‘Nejau Saulius bus mūsų karalius? ! ’ Paduokite juos mums, mes juos nubausime mirtimi. "
1Sa 11:12 And the people said unto Samuel, Who is he that said, Shall Saul reign over us? bring the men, that we may put them to death.
Iš 32:10 Todėl dabar palik mane vieną, kad mano įniršis jiems įsiliepsnotų ir juos sunaikinčiau, o iš tavęs padaryčiau didelę tautą. "
Ex 32:10 Now therefore let me alone, that my wrath may wax hot against them, and that I may consume them: and I will make of thee a great nation.
Pr 38:29 Bet kaip tik tuo metu jis įtraukė rankutę, ir išėjo jo brolis. Pribuvėja ištarė: "Kokią spragą sau pasidarei! " Todėl jis buvo pavadintas Perezu.
Ge 38:29 And it came to pass, as he drew back his hand, that, behold, his brother came out: and she said, How hast thou broken forth? this breach be upon thee: therefore his name was called Pharez.
Job 22:8 Tarsi stipriajam priklausytų žemėir tik išrinktieji joje tegyventų!
Job 22:8 But as for the mighty man, he had the earth; and the honourable man dwelt in it.
Iz 17:6 iš jo liks tik išrankos, panašiai, kaip raškant alyvmedį, lieka dvi ar trys alyvos pačioje viršūnėje, keturios ar penkios žemiau ant šakų. ­Tai Viešpaties, Izraelio Dievo, žodis.
Isa 17:6 Yet gleaning grapes shall be left in it, as the shaking of an olive tree, two or three berries in the top of the uppermost bough, four or five in the outmost fruitful branches thereof, saith the LORD God of Israel.
Sk 10:19 Cūrišadajo sūnus Šelumielis vedė Simeono giminės gretas,
Nu 10:19 And over the host of the tribe of the children of Simeon was Shelumiel the son of Zurishaddai.
1Krn 29:20 Tada Dovydas kreipėsi į visą bendriją: "Šlovinkite Viešpatį, savo Dievą! " Ir visa bendrija pašlovino Viešpatį, savo protėvių Dievą, nulenkdama galvas ir parpuldama kniūbsčia prieš Viešpatį ir karalių.
1Ch 29:20 And David said to all the congregation, Now bless the LORD your God. And all the congregation blessed the LORD God of their fathers, and bowed down their heads, and worshipped the LORD, and the king.
Ps 69:4 Daugiau negu plaukų man ant galvos yra žmonių, kurie nekenčia manęs be priežasties. Mano priešai juodina mane melais; jie stiprūs ir nori mane užmušti. Argi turiu grąžinti, ko nesu pavogęs?
Ps 69:4 They that hate me without a cause are more than the hairs of mine head: they that would destroy me, being mine enemies wrongfully, are mighty: then I restored that which I took not away.
Kun 23:32 Ji bus jums visiško poilsio šabas, ir jūs turite pasninkauti. Mėnesio devintos dienos vakare, nuo vakaro ligi vakaro, švęsite šį jūsų šabą. "
Le 23:32 It shall be unto you a sabbath of rest, and ye shall afflict your souls: in the ninth day of the month at even, from even unto even, shall ye celebrate your sabbath.
Ps 104:33 Giedosiu Viešpačiui, kolei gyvensiu, per visą gyvenimą šlovinsiu giesme savo Dievą.
Ps 104:33 I will sing unto the LORD as long as I live: I will sing praise to my God while I have my being.

Sanctus Corpus Deus