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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Krn 19:18 Bet aramėjai buvo priversti bėgti nuo Izraelio. Dovydas nukovė septynis tūkstančius aramėjų kovos vežimų vežėjų ir keturiasdešimt tūkstančių pėstininkų. Nukovė taip pat jų kariuomenės vadą Šofachą.
1Ch 19:18 But the Syrians fled before Israel; and David slew of the Syrians seven thousand men which fought in chariots, and forty thousand footmen, and killed Shophach the captain of the host.
Rom 14:6 Kas daro skirtumą tarp dienų, daro tai Viešpačiui; kas valgo, valgo Viešpačiui, nes dėkoja Dievui; o kas nevalgo, nevalgo Viešpačiui ir taip pat dėkoja Dievui.
Ro 14:6 He that regardeth the day, regardeth it unto the Lord; and he that regardeth not the day, to the Lord he doth not regard it. He that eateth, eateth to the Lord, for he giveth God thanks; and he that eateth not, to the Lord he eateth not, and giveth God thanks.
1Jn 5:10 Kas tiki Dievo Sūnų, tas turi savyje tą liudijimą. Kas Dievo netiki, tas jį melagiu verčia, nes nepatikėjo liudijimu, kurį Dievas davė apie savo Sūnų.
1J 5:10 He that believeth on the Son of God hath the witness in himself: he that believeth not God hath made him a liar; because he believeth not the record that God gave of his Son.
1Krn 9:27 Naktį jie praleisdavo Dievo Namų aplinkoje, nes buvo atsakingi už sargybą ir turėjo pareigą juos kas rytą atidaryti.
1Ch 9:27 And they lodged round about the house of God, because the charge was upon them, and the opening thereof every morning pertained to them.
1Tim 1:6 Kai kurie, nuklydę nuo šių dalykų, paskendo tuščiuose plepaluose.
1Ti 1:6 From which some having swerved have turned aside unto vain jangling;
Ef 6:11 Apsiginkluokite visais Dievo ginklais, kad galėtumėte išsilaikyti prieš velnio klastas.
Ep 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
Iz 32:12 muškitės sau į krūtinę dėl gražiųjų laukų, dėl derlingųjų vynmedžių,
Isa 32:12 They shall lament for the teats, for the pleasant fields, for the fruitful vine.
2Krn 30:16 Užėmę savo tarnybos vietas pagal Dievo vyro Mozės Įstatymą, kunigai šlakstė jiems levitų rankomis paduotą kraują.
2Ch 30:16 And they stood in their place after their manner, according to the law of Moses the man of God: the priests sprinkled the blood, which they received of the hand of the Levites.
1Kar 21:6 Jis papasakojo jai: "Kalbėjausi su Nabotu Jezreeliečiu ir sakiau jam: ‘Parduok man savo vynuogyną už pinigus, arba, jei tau patinka, duosiu už jį kitą vynuogyną’, ­ bet jis atsakė: ‘Aš savo vynuogyno tau neduosiu! ’"
1Ki 21:6 And he said unto her, Because I spake unto Naboth the Jezreelite, and said unto him, Give me thy vineyard for money; or else, if it please thee, I will give thee another vineyard for it: and he answered, I will not give thee my vineyard.
Pat 14:6 Pašaipūnas mėgina būti sumanus, bet negali, o žmogus, kuris suvokia, lengvai įgyja išmanymo.
Pr 14:6 A scorner seeketh wisdom, and findeth it not: but knowledge is easy unto him that understandeth.
Iš 36:14 Jie padirbo ir dangas iš ožkos vilnos Palapinei viršum Padangtės. Tų dangų padirbo vienuolika.
Ex 36:14 And he made curtains of goats' hair for the tent over the tabernacle: eleven curtains he made them.
Pat 29:3 Žmogus, mėgstantis išmintį, neša savo tėvui laimę, o kas bendrauja su kekšėmis, tas eikvoja savo turtą.
Pr 29:3 Whoso loveth wisdom rejoiceth his father: but he that keepeth company with harlots spendeth his substance.
Iš 21:3 Jei ateina nevedęs, jis išeis nevedęs; jei ateina vedęs, jo žmona išeis drauge su juo.
Ex 21:3 If he came in by himself, he shall go out by himself: if he were married, then his wife shall go out with him.
Kun 26:44 Tačiau, nepaisant viso to, net kai jie bus priešų šalyje, jų neatmesiu ir nepaniekinsiu, kad juos visiškai sunaikinčiau, sulaužydamas su jais sudarytą Sandorą, nes aš esu Viešpats, jų Dievas.
Le 26:44 And yet for all that, when they be in the land of their enemies, I will not cast them away, neither will I abhor them, to destroy them utterly, and to break my covenant with them: for I am the LORD their God.
Įst 26:11 Tada džiaugsiesi, drauge su levitu ir ateiviu, gyvenančiu su tavimi, visu geru, kurį Viešpats, tavo Dievas, yra davęs tau ir tavo namams.
De 26:11 And thou shalt rejoice in every good thing which the LORD thy God hath given unto thee, and unto thine house, thou, and the Levite, and the stranger that is among you.
Joz 16:7 Nuo Janoacho riba leidžiasi į Atarotus bei Naaratą ir, paliesdama Jerichą, baigiasi prie Jordano.
Jos 16:7 And it went down from Janohah to Ataroth, and to Naarath, and came to Jericho, and went out at Jordan.
Dan 11:20 Jo vietą užims žmogus, pasiųsiantis pareigūną su karališka palyda išreikalauti duoklės, tačiau po kelių dienų ir jis bus nužudytas, bet ne iš pykčio ir ne mūšyje.
Da 11:20 Then shall stand up in his estate a raiser of taxes in the glory of the kingdom: but within few days he shall be destroyed, neither in anger, nor in battle.
Ps 119:94 Tavo esu, tad gelbėk mane, nes aš neatsidžiaugiu tavo įsakais.
Ps 119:94 I am thine, save me: for I have sought thy precepts.
Jer 48:30 "Aš pats pažįstu, ­ tai Viešpaties žodis, ­ jo įžūlumą: meluoja jis pagyromis, meluoja ir darbais.
Jer 48:30 I know his wrath, saith the LORD; but it shall not be so; his lies shall not so effect it.
2Sam 13:36 Vos jam tai ištarus, atėjo karaliaus sūnūs. Jie pravirko balsu. Ir Dovydas, ir visi jo dvariškiai verkė karčiomis ašaromis.
2Sa 13:36 And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king's sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore.

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