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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Iš 25:23 Padarysi iš akacijos medžio stalą dviejų uolekčių ilgio, vienos uolekties pločio ir pusantros uolekties aukščio.
Ex 25:23 Thou shalt also make a table of shittim wood: two cubits shall be the length thereof, and a cubit the breadth thereof, and a cubit and a half the height thereof.
Ps 71:18 Tad nepalik manęs, Dieve, net žilos senatvės sulaukusio; būk su manimi, kol skelbiu tavo galybęvisoms būsimoms kartoms. Tavo jėga
Ps 71:18 Now also when I am old and greyheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed thy strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come.
Jer 27:13 Kodėl gi tu ir tavo tauta turėtumėte žūti nuo kalavijo, bado ir maro, kaip Viešpats grasė tautai, kuri nepasiduoda Babilono karaliui?
Jer 27:13 Why will ye die, thou and thy people, by the sword, by the famine, and by the pestilence, as the LORD hath spoken against the nation that will not serve the king of Babylon?
Gal 4:20 Aš norėčiau būti dabar pas jus, kad žinočiau, kaip prabilti, nes neišmanau, ką man su jumis daryti.
Ga 4:20 I desire to be present with you now, and to change my voice; for I stand in doubt of you.
Pat 15:11 Šeolas ir Prapulties vieta atviri Viešpačiui, juo labiau­ žmonių širdys!
Pr 15:11 Hell and destruction are before the LORD: how much more then the hearts of the children of men?
1Kar 21:2 Ahabas kalbėjo Nabotui: "Duok man savo vynuogyną, kad galėčiau turėti daržą, nes jis kaip tik yra šalia mano rūmų. Už jį duosiu tau geresnį vynuogyną arba, jei tau patinka, sumokėsiu jo kainą pinigais. "
1Ki 21:2 And Ahab spake unto Naboth, saying, Give me thy vineyard, that I may have it for a garden of herbs, because it is near unto my house: and I will give thee for it a better vineyard than it; or, if it seem good to thee, I will give thee the worth of it in money.
1Kar 8:2 Visi Izraelio vyrai susirinko pas karalių Saliamoną į iškilmę etanimo mėnesį, tai yra septintą mėnesį.
1Ki 8:2 And all the men of Israel assembled themselves unto king Solomon at the feast in the month Ethanim, which is the seventh month.
Mt 21:32 Juk Jonas atėjo pas jus teisumo keliu, bet jūs netikėjote juo. O muitininkai ir ištvirkėlės tikėjo. Bet jūs, nors tai matėte, nė vėliau neapsigalvojote ir netikėjote juo.
Mat 21:32 For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him.
Koh 4:14 Juk pirmasis gali net iš kalėjimo išeiti ir tapti karaliumi, tuo tarpu pastarasis, net gimęs karaliumi, gali tapti elgeta.
Ec 4:14 For out of prison he cometh to reign; whereas also he that is born in his kingdom becometh poor.
Iz 37:20 Dabar, Viešpatie, mūsų Dieve, gelbėk mus iš jo rankų, kad visos karalystės žemėje žinotų, jog tu vienas, Viešpatie, esi Dievas! "
Isa 37:20 Now therefore, O LORD our God, save us from his hand, that all the kingdoms of the earth may know that thou art the LORD, even thou only.
Jl 1:13 Vilkitės ašutinę ir raudokite, kunigai, aimanuokite, aukuro tarnai! Ateikite, išbūkite naktį su ašutine, mano Dievo tarnai, nes jūsų Dievo Namams trūksta javų atnašųir liejamųjų aukų.
Joe 1:13 Gird yourselves, and lament, ye priests: howl, ye ministers of the altar: come, lie all night in sackcloth, ye ministers of my God: for the meat offering and the drink offering is withholden from the house of your God.
Joz 12:22 Kedešo karalius ­ vienas, Jokneamo Karmelyje karalius ­ vienas,
Jos 12:22 The king of Kedesh, one; the king of Jokneam of Carmel, one;
Pr 30:41 Be to, kai kergdavosi stipresnieji kaimenės gyvuliai, Jokūbas padėdavo lazdas į lovius priešais gyvulių akis, idant kergtųsi jas matydami,
Ge 30:41 And it came to pass, whensoever the stronger cattle did conceive, that Jacob laid the rods before the eyes of the cattle in the gutters, that they might conceive among the rods.
1Kar 2:44 Be to, karalius pridūrė: "Savo širdyje tu žinai visa pikta, ką padarei mano tėvui Dovydui. Dabar Viešpats sugrąžina tavo pikta tau pačiam ant galvos.
1Ki 2:44 The king said moreover to Shimei, Thou knowest all the wickedness which thine heart is privy to, that thou didst to David my father: therefore the LORD shall return thy wickedness upon thine own head;
Įst 27:5 Ten pastatysi ir aukurą Viešpačiui, savo Dievui, aukurą iš akmenų. Netašyk jų geležiniu įrankiu.
De 27:5 And there shalt thou build an altar unto the LORD thy God, an altar of stones: thou shalt not lift up any iron tool upon them.
Ps 98:4 Džiaugsmingai klegėkite Viešpačiui, visos šalys, giedokite džiugias šlovės giesmes!
Ps 98:4 Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all the earth: make a loud noise, and rejoice, and sing praise.
Įst 33:8 O apie Levį sakė: "Tebūna tavo Tumimai ir Urimaiištikimajam vyrui, išmėgintam prie Masos, su kuriuo grūmeisi prie Meribos vandenų.
De 33:8 And of Levi he said, Let thy Thummim and thy Urim be with thy holy one, whom thou didst prove at Massah, and with whom thou didst strive at the waters of Meribah;
Kun 14:30 Tada jis atnašaus vieną iš purplelių ar balandžių ­ ką žmogus išgali,
Le 14:30 And he shall offer the one of the turtledoves, or of the young pigeons, such as he can get;
Kun 23:27 "Bet šio mėnesio dešimta diena yra Permaldavimo diena. Ji bus jums šventa sueiga; pasninkausite ir aukosite Viešpaties ugninę atnašą.
Le 23:27 Also on the tenth day of this seventh month there shall be a day of atonement: it shall be an holy convocation unto you; and ye shall afflict your souls, and offer an offering made by fire unto the LORD.
Joz 3:13 Kai kojos kunigų, nešančių Viešpaties, visõs žemės Viešpaties, Skrynią, sustos Jordano vandenyse, Jordano vandenys paliaus tekėję. Vandenys, tekantys iš aukštupio, sustos kaip tvirtas pylimas. "
Jos 3:13 And it shall come to pass, as soon as the soles of the feet of the priests that bear the ark of the LORD, the LORD of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of Jordan, that the waters of Jordan shall be cut off from the waters that come down from above; and they shall stand upon an heap.

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