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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Sk 29:13 Atnašausite deginamąją auką dėl malonaus kvapo Viešpačiui: trylika jautukų, du avinus, keturiolika mitulių avinėlių. Jie turi būti sveiki.
Nu 29:13 And ye shall offer a burnt offering, a sacrifice made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD; thirteen young bullocks, two rams, and fourteen lambs of the first year; they shall be without blemish:
1Kar 1:19 Surengęs jaučių, nupenėtų veršių bei gausybės avių aukojimo iškilmę, jis pasikvietė visus karaliaus vaikus, kunigą Abjatarą ir kariuomenės vadą Joabą, bet tavo tarno Saliamono nepakvietė.
1Ki 1:19 And he hath slain oxen and fat cattle and sheep in abundance, and hath called all the sons of the king, and Abiathar the priest, and Joab the captain of the host: but Solomon thy servant hath he not called.
Ps 105:45 kad paklustų jo įstatamsir laikytųsi jo įsakymų. Šlovinkite Viešpatį!
Ps 105:45 That they might observe his statutes, and keep his laws. Praise ye the LORD.
Jer 25:30 O tu, kaip pranašas, visus šiuos žodžius paskelbk jiems ir pasakyk: ‘Sugriaudžia Viešpats iš aukštybių, iš savo šventojo būsto jis griaudžia. Garsiai aidi jo griausmas savo kaimenei, tarsi vynuoges traiškančiųjų šauksmas.
Jer 25:30 Therefore prophesy thou against them all these words, and say unto them, The LORD shall roar from on high, and utter his voice from his holy habitation; he shall mightily roar upon his habitation; he shall give a shout, as they that tread the grapes, against all the inhabitants of the earth.
2Kar 12:11 Suskaičiavus pinigai būdavo paduodami į rankas darbų prižiūrėtojams, kurie buvo atsakingi už Viešpaties Namus. O šie savo ruožtu išmokėdavo dailidėms ir statytojams, dirbantiems Viešpaties Namuose,
2Ki 12:11 And they gave the money, being told, into the hands of them that did the work, that had the oversight of the house of the LORD: and they laid it out to the carpenters and builders, that wrought upon the house of the LORD,
1Sam 27:5 Dovydas kreipėsi į Achišą: "Jei radau malonę tavo akyse, tegu būna man duota vieta gyventi viename iš miestelių. Kam gi turėtų tavo tarnas gyventi su tavimi karališkajame mieste? "
1Sa 27:5 And David said unto Achish, If I have now found grace in thine eyes, let them give me a place in some town in the country, that I may dwell there: for why should thy servant dwell in the royal city with thee?
Lk 17:20 Fariziejų paklaustas, kada ateis Dievo karalystė, Jėzus paaiškino: "Dievo karalystė ateina nepastebimai.
Lu 17:20 And when he was demanded of the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God should come, he answered them and said, The kingdom of God cometh not with observation:
Jer 31:30 Ne! Kiekvienas mirs už savo paties kaltę: dantys atšips tam, kuris valgo rūgščias vynuoges.
Jer 31:30 But every one shall die for his own iniquity: every man that eateth the sour grape, his teeth shall be set on edge.
Gal 6:7 Neapsigaukite! Dievas nesiduoda išjuokiamas. Ką žmogus sėja, tai ir pjaus.
Ga 6:7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
1Tes 1:7 bet ir tapote pavyzdžiu visiems Makedonijos bei Achajos tikintiesiems.
1Th 1:7 So that ye were ensamples to all that believe in Macedonia and Achaia.
Lk 20:27 Pas jį atėjo sadukiejų, kurie neigia mirusiųjų prisikėlimą, ir paklausė:
Lu 20:27 Then came to him certain of the Sadducees, which deny that there is any resurrection; and they asked him,
Iz 2:22 O, liaukitės kliautis žmogumi! Juk jis turi tik gyvybės alsavimą! Kuo gi jis nusipelnė pagarbos?
Isa 2:22 Cease ye from man, whose breath is in his nostrils: for wherein is he to be accounted of ?
Pr 18:16 Vyrai pakilo ir žvalgėsi, kaip eiti Sodomos link. Abraomas lydėdamas ėjo kartu su jais.
Ge 18:16 And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.
Jn 14:1 Tegul neišsigąsta jūsų širdys! Tikite Dievą, tikėkite ir mane!
Jo 14:1 Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
Jer 2:16 Net Nofo ir Tachpanheso žmonėsskuta tavo viršugalvį.
Jer 2:16 Also the children of Noph and Tahapanes have broken the crown of thy head.
Lk 9:26 Jei kas gėdysis manęs ir mano žodžių, to gėdysis ir Žmogaus Sūnus, kai ateis su savąja bei Tėvo ir šventųjų angelų šlove.
Lu 9:26 For whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words, of him shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he shall come in his own glory, and in his Father's, and of the holy angels.
Sk 27:12 Viešpats kalbėjo Mozei, tardamas: "Užkopk į šį Abarimų virtinės kalną ir pamatyk kraštą, kurį duodu izraelitams.
Nu 27:12 And the LORD said unto Moses, Get thee up into this mount Abarim, and see the land which I have given unto the children of Israel.
Mk 6:3 Argi jis ne dailidė, ne Marijos sūnus, Jokūbo, Jozės, Judo ir Simono brolis? ! Argi jo seserys negyvena čia, pas mus? ! " Ir jie piktinosi juo.
Mar 6:3 Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joses, and of Juda, and Simon? and are not his sisters here with us? And they were offended at him.
Ps 10:11 Nedorėlis mano sau: "Dievui tai nerūpi. Jis slepia savo veidą, jis niekada nežiūri. "
Ps 10:11 He hath said in his heart, God hath forgotten: he hideth his face; he will never see it.
Įst 14:17 pelikanas, palšasis grifas, kormoranas,
De 14:17 And the pelican, and the gier eagle, and the cormorant,

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