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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Pr 34:21 "Tie žmonės mums draugiški. Tesikuria jie krašte ir tesikilnoja jame laisvai, nes krašte yra apsčiai jiems vietos. Galėsime imti jų dukteris į žmonas ir duoti jiems savo dukteris.
Ge 34:21 These men are peaceable with us; therefore let them dwell in the land, and trade therein; for the land, behold, it is large enough for them; let us take their daughters to us for wives, and let us give them our daughters.
Mt 22:5 Tačiau kviečiamieji to nepaisė ir nuėjo kas sau: vienas lauko arti, kitas prekiauti,
Mat 22:5 But they made light of it, and went their ways, one to his farm, another to his merchandise:
1Sam 8:2 Jo pirmagimio sūnaus vardas buvo Joelis, o antrojo ­ Abija. Jiedu buvo teisėjai Beer Šeboje.
1Sa 8:2 Now the name of his firstborn was Joel; and the name of his second, Abiah: they were judges in Beersheba.
Ez 36:18 Išliejau ant jų savo įniršį dėl kraujo, kurį jie buvo pralieję krašte, ir už stabus, kuriais buvo jį suteršę.
Eze 36:18 Wherefore I poured my fury upon them for the blood that they had shed upon the land, and for their idols wherewith they had polluted it:
Pr 34:25 Trečią dieną, kai jie dar kentėjo skausmus, du Jokūbo sūnūs ­ Simeonas ir Levis, Dinos broliai, pasiėmę kalavijus, nelauktai užpuolė miestą ir išžudė visus vyriškius.
Ge 34:25 And it came to pass on the third day, when they were sore, that two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah's brethren, took each man his sword, and came upon the city boldly, and slew all the males.
Įst 14:25 gali dešimtinę pakeisti į pinigus. Su pinigais rankoje saugiai nueik į vietą, kurią Viešpats, tavo Dievas, bus išsirinkęs.
De 14:25 Then shalt thou turn it into money, and bind up the money in thine hand, and shalt go unto the place which the LORD thy God shall choose:
Iz 38:17 todėl mano kartėlis pavirto ramybe. Tu apsaugojai mane nuo mirties bedugnėsir visas mano nuodėmes nusviedei sau už nugaros.
Isa 38:17 Behold, for peace I had great bitterness: but thou hast in love to my soul delivered it from the pit of corruption: for thou hast cast all my sins behind thy back.
Sk 2:28 Jo vyrų, pasak surašymo, buvo keturiasdešimt vienas tūkstantis penki šimtai.
Nu 2:28 And his host, and those that were numbered of them, were forty and one thousand and five hundred.
Kun 6:11 Tada nusivilks savo apdarą ir, apsivilkęs kitais drabužiais, išneš pelenus už stovyklos į švarią vietą.
Le 6:11 And he shall put off his garments, and put on other garments, and carry forth the ashes without the camp unto a clean place.
Neh 12:2 Amarija, Maluchas, Hatušas,
Ne 12:2 Amariah, Malluch, Hattush,
2Krn 32:30 Tas pats Ezekijas uždarė Gihono vandenų angą ir nukreipė juos žemyn į vakarinį Dovydo miesto pakraštį. Ezekiją lydėjo sėkmė visuose jo žygiuose.
2Ch 32:30 This same Hezekiah also stopped the upper watercourse of Gihon, and brought it straight down to the west side of the city of David. And Hezekiah prospered in all his works.
Sk 9:9 Viešpats kalbėjo Mozei, tardamas:
Nu 9:9 And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
Mt 27:51 Ir štai šventovės uždanga perplyšo pusiau nuo viršaus iki apačios, ir žemė sudrebėjo, ir uolos ėmė skeldėti.
Mat 27:51 And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent;
Įst 22:17 Prasimanė net kaltinimų, sakydamas: ‘Neradau įrodymo, kad tavo duktė būtų mergelė. ’ Betgi štai mano dukters mergystės ženklai. ’ Tada jiedu išskleis drabužį miesto seniūnų akivaizdoje.
De 22:17 And, lo, he hath given occasions of speech against her, saying, I found not thy daughter a maid; and yet these are the tokens of my daughter's virginity. And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city.
Joz 8:25 Tą dieną kritusių vyrų ir moterų, visų Ajo miesto gyventojų, buvo dvylika tūkstančių.
Jos 8:25 And so it was, that all that fell that day, both of men and women, were twelve thousand, even all the men of Ai.
Rd 4:3 ג Net šakalai duoda spenįžįsti savo jaunikliams, bet duktė, mano tauta, tapo žiauri, panaši į dykumos stručius.
La 4:3 Even the sea monsters draw out the breast, they give suck to their young ones: the daughter of my people is become cruel, like the ostriches in the wilderness.
Jl 2:6 Prieš juos dreba tautos, blykšta visų veidai.
Joe 2:6 Before their face the people shall be much pained: all faces shall gather blackness.
Rut 4:15 Tebūna jis tau paguoda ir parama senatvėje, nes jį pagimdė tavo marti, kuri tave myli ir yra geresnė negu septyni sūnūs! "
Ru 4:15 And he shall be unto thee a restorer of thy life, and a nourisher of thine old age: for thy daughter in law, which loveth thee, which is better to thee than seven sons, hath born him.
Mt 14:23 Atleidęs minią, jis užkopė nuošaliai į kalną melstis. Ir, atėjus vakarui, jis buvo ten vienas.
Mat 14:23 And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone.
Pat 10:19 Kur daug kalbama, ten netrūksta kaltės, o protingo žmogaus kalba santūri.
Pr 10:19 In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.

Sanctus Corpus Deus