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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Krn 1:1 Dovydo sūnus Saliamonas įsitvirtino savo karalystėje. Viešpats, jo Dievas, buvo su juo ir darė jį vis iškilesnį.
2Ch 1:1 And Solomon the son of David was strengthened in his kingdom, and the LORD his God was with him, and magnified him exceedingly.
Mk 7:14 Ir vėl sušaukęs minią, Jėzus kalbėjo: "Paklausykite manęs visi ir supraskite:
Mar 7:14 And when he had called all the people unto him, he said unto them, Hearken unto me every one of you, and understand:
1Sam 15:18 Viešpats tave pasiuntė į žygį, tardamas: ‘Eik ir skirk sunaikinti tuos nusidėjėlius amalekiečius! Kovok, kol jie bus sunaikinti. ’
1Sa 15:18 And the LORD sent thee on a journey, and said, Go and utterly destroy the sinners the Amalekites, and fight against them until they be consumed.
Koh 8:16 Kai atsidėjau iš širdies mokytis išminties ir stebėti darbus, kuriuos žmogus atlieka žemėje, apsieidamas net be miego dieną ir naktį,
Ec 8:16 When I applied mine heart to know wisdom, and to see the business that is done upon the earth: (for also there is that neither day nor night seeth sleep with his eyes:)
1Tes 2:16 nes draudžia mums skelbti pagonims, kad šie būtų išganyti. Taip jie nuolat pildo savo nuodėmių saiką, ir ant jų krinta galutinė Dievo rūstybė.
1Th 2:16 Forbidding us to speak to the Gentiles that they might be saved, to fill up their sins alway: for the wrath is come upon them to the uttermost.
Mt 5:27 Jūs esate girdėję, jog buvo pasakyta: Nesvetimauk!
Mat 5:27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:
Jer 51:16 Jam sugriaudus, kyla vandenų sąmyšis danguje, jis pakelia garus nuo žemės pakraščių, lietų pripildo žaibų, vėją paleidžia iš savo svirnų.
Jer 51:16 When he uttereth his voice, there is a multitude of waters in the heavens; and he causeth the vapours to ascend from the ends of the earth: he maketh lightnings with rain, and bringeth forth the wind out of his treasures.
2Krn 6:16 Tad dabar, Viešpatie, Izraelio Dieve, įvykdyk savo tarnui, mano tėvui Dovydui, ir tą pažadą, kurį jam davei, tardamas: ‘Nestigs tau niekada mano akivaizdoje palikuonio, sėdinčio Izraelio soste, jeigu tik tavo vaikai bus atidūs savo keliui ir eis mano mokymo taku, kaip tu ėjai mano akivaizdoje. ’
2Ch 6:16 Now therefore, O LORD God of Israel, keep with thy servant David my father that which thou hast promised him, saying, There shall not fail thee a man in my sight to sit upon the throne of Israel; yet so that thy children take heed to their way to walk in my law, as thou hast walked before me.
Pat 9:6 Atsisakykite nesubrendimo, kad gyventumėteir eitumėte suvokimo keliu.
Pr 9:6 Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding.
Ez 18:6 jei jis alkuose nevalgo , akių į Izraelio namų stabus nepakelia, neišniekina savo artimo žmonos, nesiartina prie moters per jos mėnesines,
Eze 18:6 And hath not eaten upon the mountains, neither hath lifted up his eyes to the idols of the house of Israel, neither hath defiled his neighbour's wife, neither hath come near to a menstruous woman,
Iz 13:15 Kas tik bus pagautas, tas bus nudurtas; visi, kurie bus pagauti, kris nuo kalavijo.
Isa 13:15 Every one that is found shall be thrust through; and every one that is joined unto them shall fall by the sword.
Oz 5:12 Tarsi kandis esu Efraimui, tarsi puvimas Judo namams.
Ho 5:12 Therefore will I be unto Ephraim as a moth, and to the house of Judah as rottenness.
Iz 5:1 Tebūna man leista sugiedoti savo mylimajam meilės giesmę apie jo vynuogyną: Mano mylimasis turėjo vynuogynąderlingos kalvos atšlaitėse.
Isa 5:1 Now will I sing to my wellbeloved a song of my beloved touching his vineyard. My wellbeloved hath a vineyard in a very fruitful hill:
Jok 5:12 Bet pirmiausia, mano broliai, neprisiekinėkite nei dangumi, nei žeme, nei kitokia priesaika. Tebūnie jūsų "taip" ­ taip ir "ne" ­ ne, kad nepakliūtumėte į teismą.
Ja 5:12 But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.
1Sam 17:43 Filistinas tarė Dovydui: "Argi aš šuva, kad su lazda ateini prieš mane? " Filistinas keikė Dovydą savo dievais.
1Sa 17:43 And the Philistine said unto David, Am I a dog, that thou comest to me with staves? And the Philistine cursed David by his gods.
Iz 14:16 Visi, pamatę tave, sutriks; žvelgs į tave ir klaus: "Nejaugi čia tas žmogus, kuris sudrebino žemęir sunaikino karalystes;
Isa 14:16 They that see thee shall narrowly look upon thee, and consider thee, saying, Is this the man that made the earth to tremble, that did shake kingdoms;
Ez 2:10 Jis išvyniojo jį prieš mane: ritinys buvo prirašytas iš abiejų pusių. Jame buvo surašytos raudos, aimanos ir dejonės.
Eze 2:10 And he spread it before me; and it was written within and without: and there was written therein lamentations, and mourning, and woe.
Est 9:26 Taigi dėl viso, kas buvo tame laiške parašyta, dėl to, ką jie buvo išgyvenę, ir dėl to, kas jiems buvo nutikę,
Es 9:26 Wherefore they called these days Purim after the name of Pur. Therefore for all the words of this letter, and of that which they had seen concerning this matter, and which had come unto them,
Mk 5:22 Šit ateina vienas iš sinagogos vyresniųjų, vardu Jayras, ir, pamatęs jį, puola jam po kojų karštai maldaudamas:
Mar 5:22 And, behold, there cometh one of the rulers of the synagogue, Jairus by name; and when he saw him, he fell at his feet,
Ps 127:2 Tuščia jums anksti keltisir vėlai eiti gulti, jums, kurie valgote sunkiai uždirbtą duoną, nes tais, kuriuos myli, Viešpats pasirūpina jiems tebemiegant.
Ps 127:2 It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.

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