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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Apd 27:20 Ilgą laiką nematydami nei saulės, nei žvaigždžių, smarkios audros blaškomi, mes galiausiai praradome bet kokią viltį išsigelbėti.
Ac 27:20 And when neither sun nor stars in many days appeared, and no small tempest lay on us, all hope that we should be saved was then taken away.
Joz 7:16 Kitą rytą anksti Jozuė pašaukė Izraelį giminėmis. Buvo nurodyta Judo giminė.
Jos 7:16 So Joshua rose up early in the morning, and brought Israel by their tribes; and the tribe of Judah was taken:
Est 4:16 "Eik, surink visus žydus, kurie gyvena Sūzuose. Pasninkaukite už mane! Nevalgykite ir negerkite ištisas tris dienas ir naktis. Ir aš drauge su savo tarnaitėmis, kaip ir jūs, pasninkausiu. Po to, nepaisydama įstatymo, eisiu pas karalių. Jeigu turėsiu žūti, žūsiu! "
Es 4:16 Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish.
Iz 29:18 Tą dieną kurčiai išgirs knygos žodžius, aklieji praregės iš savo niūrios tamsybės.
Isa 29:18 And in that day shall the deaf hear the words of the book, and the eyes of the blind shall see out of obscurity, and out of darkness.
Dan 7:10 Ugnies upė liejosiir tekėjo priešais jį. Tūkstančių tūkstančiai jam tarnavoir miriadų miriadai stovėjo priešais jį. Teismas sėdo posėdžiauti, ir buvo atskleistos knygos.
Da 7:10 A fiery stream issued and came forth from before him: thousand thousands ministered unto him, and ten thousand times ten thousand stood before him: the judgment was set, and the books were opened.
Sk 2:18 Vakarų pusėje bus Efraimo stovyklos ženklas ir greta prie gretos. Efraimo žmonių vadas bus Amihudo sūnus Elišama.
Nu 2:18 On the west side shall be the standard of the camp of Ephraim according to their armies: and the captain of the sons of Ephraim shall be Elishama the son of Ammihud.
Dan 6:8 Taigi, o karaliau, paskelbk uždraudimą ir pasirašyk raštą, nepakeičiamą ir neatšaukiamą pagal medų ir persų įstatymą. "
Da 6:8 Now, O king, establish the decree, and sign the writing, that it be not changed, according to the law of the Medes and Persians, which altereth not.
Apr 22:4 Jie regės jo veidą, ir jų kaktose bus jo vardas.
Re 22:4 And they shall see his face; and his name shall be in their foreheads.
Lk 10:17 Septyniasdešimt du sugrįžo ir su džiaugsmu kalbėjo: "Viešpatie, mums paklūsta net demonai dėl tavo vardo. "
Lu 10:17 And the seventy returned again with joy, saying, Lord, even the devils are subject unto us through thy name.
Iz 24:20 Žemė kaip girta svyruos, kaip sargo pašiūrė sverdės. Jos nuodėmės ją slegia; ji parpuls po jų naštair nepajėgs atsikelti. "
Isa 24:20 The earth shall reel to and fro like a drunkard, and shall be removed like a cottage; and the transgression thereof shall be heavy upon it; and it shall fall, and not rise again.
Sk 20:16 Mes šaukėmės Viešpaties, jis išgirdo mūsų balsą, pasiuntė angelą ir išvedė mus iš Egipto. Štai dabar mes Kadeše, mieste prie tavo žemės pakraščio.
Nu 20:16 And when we cried unto the LORD, he heard our voice, and sent an angel, and hath brought us forth out of Egypt: and, behold, we are in Kadesh, a city in the uttermost of thy border:
Pat 24:16 Juk nors teisusis septynis kartus parpuola, jis vėl atsikelia, o nedorėlį užklumpa nelaimė.
Pr 24:16 For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief.
Mt 27:41 Taip pat tyčiojosi aukštieji kunigai su Rašto aiškintojais ir seniūnais,
Mat 27:41 Likewise also the chief priests mocking him, with the scribes and elders, said,
2Kar 5:2 Kartą per vieną antpuolį aramėjai paėmė iš Izraelio į nelaisvę jauną mergaitę, ir ji tapo Naamano žmonos tarnaite.
2Ki 5:2 And the Syrians had gone out by companies, and had brought away captive out of the land of Israel a little maid; and she waited on Naaman's wife.
Pr 8:13 Šeši šimtai pirmų metų pirmo mėnesio pirmą dieną vandenys žemėje pradėjo sekti. Nojus nukėlė laivo dangą, apsižvalgė ir pamatė, kad žemės paviršius džiūsta.
Ge 8:13 And it came to pass in the six hundredth and first year, in the first month, the first day of the month, the waters were dried up from off the earth: and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and, behold, the face of the ground was dry.
Įst 4:17 ar panašų į bet kokį gyvulį žemėje, ar į bet kokį paukštį, skraidantį padangėse,
De 4:17 The likeness of any beast that is on the earth, the likeness of any winged fowl that flieth in the air,
Ts 6:23 Bet Viešpats tarė jam: "Ramybė tau! Nebijok, tu nemirsi. "
Judg 6:23 And the LORD said unto him, Peace be unto thee; fear not: thou shalt not die.
Job 22:18 Tačiau jis pripildė jų namus gėrybių! (Nedorėlių galvosena man atstumianti! )
Job 22:18 Yet he filled their houses with good things: but the counsel of the wicked is far from me.
Pat 16:3 Pavesk savo darbą Viešpačiui, ir tavo užmojai bus sėkmingi.
Pr 16:3 Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established.
Ps 136:9 mėnulį ir žvaigždes ­ nakčiai valdyti, nes jo ištikimoji meilė amžina.
Ps 136:9 The moon and stars to rule by night: for his mercy endureth for ever.

Sanctus Corpus Deus